having fun (not?)

why is it that time flies when you're on the computer? i should be fixing dinner, but i got side tracked checking e-mail, reading websites and blogs and etsy listings. good grief. here's a photo i took a couple days past of an ant on one of the peonies. if you've visited my website, you know how much we love peonies. actually, we now have some more to plant. it seems that we rescue them from people who know longer want them. the woman we got the most recent ones from hates ants and believes the peonies attract the ants. i don't believe that's the case. they just happen to like what ever it is the peonies secrete from the buds. interesting. i suppose i could spend more time looking that tidbit of information up in google, but i'll save that for another day. yesterday i got some interesting items from a couple of antique shops along the way. stuff to inspire projects. i got my first csa delivery of the season on friday: asparagus, cilantro, lettuce, rubbarb, bok choy, and radishes. all yummy. now i've got to fix new and exciting recipes. i love cooking though, that's no problem. :)

well, i should really change my blog title today to not having fun. i found out tonight that my uncle clinton passed away friday. you might guess that i'm not all that close to my family. i am but i'm not. you see, i've always lived hundreds of miles from my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. i know them. i talk to them. i send them cards for birthdays, holidays and the like. but i don't really know them all that well. its kind of awkward but i am so used to it now. that's the family life that i've grown up with. my uncle clinton was a very nice guy. a wwii vet (marines) and darn proud of it. my aunt is going to be very sad for some time as they were very close. sometimes, life can be very cruel. 

springtime delay

ok. the weather had been much better the previous few days. today was kind of dreary. now it's drizzling. i know spring cannot be to far away. the weekend just flew by. the work week goes by much slower. i'm very busy at work. that makes the time go quicker. i did get some studio time on sunday afternoon. i made three easter cards, one for each of my aunts. 

i got a lot of photos scanned this weekend too. i can't believe how many photos of my sister there are. none of me. not in the box i'm going through. scanning these photos have got me a bit down. photos of all my sisters birthday parties (with cakes) and all of her friends. photos of my sister here, there and every where, especially with my mom. in many they are dressed a like. photos of my sister, mom & grandma even in front of niagara falls. the whole family (before i came along) at the wisconsin dells. all photos of things i didn't do with my family. the way i've heard it is that by the time i came along (my sister was 11 and i was a "whoops"), they had already done all of those things families do together, so they weren't about to do them again for my sake. that's why i visit all of those places now - BECAUSE I CAN. i can do it all now. if i wanted a birthday party, i'd have that too. i guess my parents did the best they knew how to do, but they weren't the greatest at it. my childhood could've been much worse. i'm always envious of kids i see at walt disney world with their parents. would i be different if i had those experiences? i would think so, but i cannot possibly imagine how. maybe i'd be more outgoing? more adventurous. i don't really know. you can't miss experiences if you have no basis for them. maybe that's why it bothers me more now than it did before, because i'm finally getting to experience those things. better late than never i guess. 

scanner fun

i set about today to start scanning all of my old family photos into the mac. it is a tedious process, not totally difficult, just time consuming. i completed a number of them, but i have a lot more to do. i have a number of slides from the 50's to scan. my dad was a camera buff. had a dark room and everything. i also have movies. as i was the baby in the family, 95% of the photos i have do not include me. lots and lots of photos/slides of my sister. all the firsts. it is difficult to go through all of these photos/slides. my sister and i were never close (an understatement). as so many people, i come from a dysfunctional family. no one needs that. no one asks for that. it just happens. if i can use these photos/slides in my art, it cannot help but to be a healing experience, right?